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GMATking94
Joined: 16 Jan 2022
Last visit: 18 Apr 2025
Posts: 175
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Given Kudos: 125
Status:Do or Die
Location: India
Schools: IIMB '25 (A) IIMC '25 (A) IIMA '25 (D) ISB '25 (I)
GMAT 1: 700 Q48 V37
GPA: 4
WE:Operations (Energy)
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Schools: IIMB '25 (A) IIMC '25 (A) IIMA '25 (D) ISB '25 (I)
GMAT 1: 700 Q48 V37
Posts: 175
Kudos:
77
11 Apr 2023, 08:15
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Q.
The following editorial appeared in the Elm City paper:
“The construction last year of a shopping mall in downtown Oak City was a mistake. Since the mall has opened, a number of local businesses have closed, and the downtown area suffers from an acute parking shortage, and arrests for crime and vagrancy have increased in the nearby Oak City Park. Elm City should pay attention to the example of the Oak City mall and deny the application to build a shopping mall in Elm City.” Discuss how well reasoned . . . etc.
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________
The argument presented above criticize the Elm City’s plan to build a shopping mall in the city citing the example of Oak City where a shopping mall construction has caused closure of local business, increase in crime and vagrancy and acute parking shortage in the area. Though the comparison seems alright between shopping malls in the above editorial, without knowing other details regarding the cities it would be incorrect to call the construction of a shopping mall in Elm City a bad decision.
Firstly, let’s consider the scenario of population size and their spending habits in both cities. These factors play a major role in deciding weather building a new shopping mall would be a good decision. In case of large population and greater spending habits there is no reason to question the construction of a new shopping complex. Further, building a shopping complex in a large city would provide ample jobs in various capacities to the city residents which would increase the city’s economy further increasing spending habits. Since, this can lead to greater prosperity within the city it can have a positive impact on the city residents which will lead to lower crime rate and vagrancy.
Secondly, let’s consider the case of both the cities location. The location of a city in close proximity to another large city can play a vital role in considering weather to build a shopping mall or not. Suppose, Oak City does not have any other large city in the close proximity and hence most of the residents used to buy their goods from the local shops. Hence, the opening of a new shopping mall can have a negative impact on their business since most resident snow have multiple options to buy their needs.
Finally, let’s consider the scenario where once city has better planning which can enable it to handle traffic and parking better than another city. This is something which needs further consideration before we can comment of weather the same issue of parking will be there in Elm City in case there is a shopping mall built.
As we can see from the above major points that comparing the scenario of building a shopping mall in Oak City to Elm City needs further investigation. We cannot compare the scenarios without investigating demographic, economic and geographic aspects of both the cities. Hence, we this comparison needs further investigation.
_________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Sajjad1994 Please rate my AWA
Thanks!
The following editorial appeared in the Elm City paper:
“The construction last year of a shopping mall in downtown Oak City was a mistake. Since the mall has opened, a number of local businesses have closed, and the downtown area suffers from an acute parking shortage, and arrests for crime and vagrancy have increased in the nearby Oak City Park. Elm City should pay attention to the example of the Oak City mall and deny the application to build a shopping mall in Elm City.” Discuss how well reasoned . . . etc.
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________
The argument presented above criticize the Elm City’s plan to build a shopping mall in the city citing the example of Oak City where a shopping mall construction has caused closure of local business, increase in crime and vagrancy and acute parking shortage in the area. Though the comparison seems alright between shopping malls in the above editorial, without knowing other details regarding the cities it would be incorrect to call the construction of a shopping mall in Elm City a bad decision.
Firstly, let’s consider the scenario of population size and their spending habits in both cities. These factors play a major role in deciding weather building a new shopping mall would be a good decision. In case of large population and greater spending habits there is no reason to question the construction of a new shopping complex. Further, building a shopping complex in a large city would provide ample jobs in various capacities to the city residents which would increase the city’s economy further increasing spending habits. Since, this can lead to greater prosperity within the city it can have a positive impact on the city residents which will lead to lower crime rate and vagrancy.
Secondly, let’s consider the case of both the cities location. The location of a city in close proximity to another large city can play a vital role in considering weather to build a shopping mall or not. Suppose, Oak City does not have any other large city in the close proximity and hence most of the residents used to buy their goods from the local shops. Hence, the opening of a new shopping mall can have a negative impact on their business since most resident snow have multiple options to buy their needs.
Finally, let’s consider the scenario where once city has better planning which can enable it to handle traffic and parking better than another city. This is something which needs further consideration before we can comment of weather the same issue of parking will be there in Elm City in case there is a shopping mall built.
As we can see from the above major points that comparing the scenario of building a shopping mall in Oak City to Elm City needs further investigation. We cannot compare the scenarios without investigating demographic, economic and geographic aspects of both the cities. Hence, we this comparison needs further investigation.
_________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Sajjad1994 Please rate my AWA
Thanks!
11 Apr 2023, 09:08
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AWA Score: 5.5 out of 6
Coherence and connectivity: 5.5/6
The essay demonstrates a high level of coherence and connectivity. The writer effectively presents a clear and organized response, with logical progression of ideas and smooth transitions between paragraphs and sentences. The use of connecting words and phrases, such as "firstly," "secondly," and "finally," helps to establish a clear structure and flow in the essay.
Word structure: 5/6
The word structure in the essay is generally effective, with varied sentence lengths and appropriate use of vocabulary. The writer uses a mix of simple and complex sentences to convey their ideas. However, there are a few instances where sentence structures could be further improved for clarity and conciseness.
Paragraph structure and formation: 5.5/6
The essay follows a standard paragraph structure with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. Each paragraph focuses on a single main idea and provides relevant evidence and examples to support the argument. The writer effectively uses topic sentences and supporting details to create well-formed paragraphs that contribute to the overall coherence of the essay.
Language and grammar: 5/6
The language and grammar used in the essay are generally accurate and proficient. The writer demonstrates a good command of English language skills, with only a few minor errors in grammar, punctuation, and word choice. However, there are a few instances where some sentences could be rephrased for clarity and precision.
Vocabulary and word expression: 5/6
The essay uses a varied and appropriate vocabulary to convey ideas effectively. The writer employs a range of vocabulary related to the topic, including terms such as "population size," "spending habits," "prosperity," and "geographic aspects." However, there is room for improvement in terms of using more sophisticated and precise vocabulary in certain areas of the essay.
Overall, the essay is well-written and effectively presents a coherent and connected response. The writer provides relevant evidence and examples to support their argument, and their reasoning is logical and well-structured. With some minor improvements in word structure, language and grammar, and vocabulary, the essay could be further enhanced. Therefore, the essay is evaluated at a score of 5.5 out of 6.
Follow the AWA forum rules for your next post, Read the rules in the post in the link below
https://gmatclub.com/forum/awa-forum-ru ... 64141.html
Coherence and connectivity: 5.5/6
The essay demonstrates a high level of coherence and connectivity. The writer effectively presents a clear and organized response, with logical progression of ideas and smooth transitions between paragraphs and sentences. The use of connecting words and phrases, such as "firstly," "secondly," and "finally," helps to establish a clear structure and flow in the essay.
Word structure: 5/6
The word structure in the essay is generally effective, with varied sentence lengths and appropriate use of vocabulary. The writer uses a mix of simple and complex sentences to convey their ideas. However, there are a few instances where sentence structures could be further improved for clarity and conciseness.
Paragraph structure and formation: 5.5/6
The essay follows a standard paragraph structure with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. Each paragraph focuses on a single main idea and provides relevant evidence and examples to support the argument. The writer effectively uses topic sentences and supporting details to create well-formed paragraphs that contribute to the overall coherence of the essay.
Language and grammar: 5/6
The language and grammar used in the essay are generally accurate and proficient. The writer demonstrates a good command of English language skills, with only a few minor errors in grammar, punctuation, and word choice. However, there are a few instances where some sentences could be rephrased for clarity and precision.
Vocabulary and word expression: 5/6
The essay uses a varied and appropriate vocabulary to convey ideas effectively. The writer employs a range of vocabulary related to the topic, including terms such as "population size," "spending habits," "prosperity," and "geographic aspects." However, there is room for improvement in terms of using more sophisticated and precise vocabulary in certain areas of the essay.
Overall, the essay is well-written and effectively presents a coherent and connected response. The writer provides relevant evidence and examples to support their argument, and their reasoning is logical and well-structured. With some minor improvements in word structure, language and grammar, and vocabulary, the essay could be further enhanced. Therefore, the essay is evaluated at a score of 5.5 out of 6.
Follow the AWA forum rules for your next post, Read the rules in the post in the link below
https://gmatclub.com/forum/awa-forum-ru ... 64141.html
GMATking94
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