ishmeet09 wrote:
Hi everyone,
I started my GMAT preparation 5 days ago, and today was the first time i practiced the AWA. Without wasting much time, I request you all to give your feedback on this.
“Neither stronger ethics regulations nor stronger enforcement mechanisms are necessary to ensure ethical behavior
by companies doing business with this department. We already have a code of ethics that companies doing business
with this department are urged to abide by, and virtually all of these companies have agreed to follow it. We also
know that the code is relevant to the current business environment because it was approved within the last year, and
in direct response to specific violations committed by companies with which we were then working—not in abstract
anticipation of potential violations, as so many such codes are.”
The following argument is flawed due to numerous reasons. This argument is primarily based on an unwarranted assumption by the said governmental department that there is no need to have stronger ethics regulations or stronger enforcement mechanisms to ensure ethical behaviour by companies (which shall also be referred to as “parties” from here on) doing business with the said department. It proceeds to provide some justification for the assumption which shall be dissected and countered below.
Elaborating on the justifications, the argument states that there is a code of ethics already in place and the companies doing business with the said department are “urged to abide by” and there is a “virtual agreement in place”. This is a bold assumption where this government department relies solely on the goodwill of the other parties involved. There is no binding agreement that the other parties have to abide by as the said agreement is “virtual” and not something that can be held up when needed. A company is expected to behave ethically but if they chose to do something unethical, they won’t have to worry too much about any severe repercussions.
Further, the argument says that the code is relevant to the latest business environment. This relevancy is unsubstantiated and not backed up with any proof. It is vague and doesn’t provide any more insights about how it is relevant.
Even if we consider that it is relevant, the most this government department can do is cut off ties with a company engaging in unethical behaviour. A written contract signed by all parties would reinforce this argument as that would allow the department to take legal action.
Hence, the original assumption by the department about not having the need to deploy stronger ethics regulations/enforcement mechanisms is, at best, is doubtful and at worst, is a portrayal of gullible behaviour.
IMO, On a first attempt - Well done !!
However , I believe this could have been written in a more structured manner with a clear demarcation of conclusion and its supporting elements along with well crafted examples. Moreover , as mentioned by Daagh sir , the length of passage is bit short for GMAT AWA. Below link can help you with respect to the structural part of the notion .
Search in gmatclub : by Chineseburned how-to-get-6-0-awa-my-guide-64327
-- Cannot post exact the link because system is restricting since my account is less than 5 days old.