On average, middle-aged consumers devote 39 percent of their retail ex

Question

The following appeared in the opinion column of a financial magazine.
“On average, middle-aged consumers devote 39 percent of their retail expenditure to department store products and services, while for younger consumers the average is only 25 percent. Since the number of middle-aged people will increase dramatically within the next decade, department stores can expect retail sales to increase significantly during that period. Furthermore, to take advantage of the trend, these stores should begin to replace some of those products intended to attract the younger consumer with products intended to attract the middle-aged consumer.”
Discuss how well reasoned... etc…

Based on an expected increase in the number of middle-aged people during the next decade, the author predicts that the retail sales at department stores will increase at a significant rate over the next ten years. To bolster the argument, the author cites statistics showing that middle-aged people devote a much higher percentage of their retail expenditure to department stores’ products and services than younger consumers do. Since the number of middle-aged people is on the rise and since they spent much than younger people on department-store goods and services, the author further recommend department stores begin to adjust their inventories to capitalize on this trend. Specifically, the author recommends that department stores increase their inventories aimed at middle-aged population and decrease inventory stocks aimed at younger population. The reasoning of this recommendation advanced is problematic in several respects. 
First of all, the argument ignores the absolute amount of expenditure that middle-aged people and younger consumers devote to department-store products and services. Although the younger consumers spend a smaller percentage of their retail expenditure to department -store products than do middle-aged customers, they might actually spend more in terms of the absolute amount. The argument omits information regarding the business volume of these two consumer groups. If it turns out that the business volume of middle-aged group’s 39% is smaller than that of younger consumers’ 25%, the retail sales may not increase in the next decade.
Second, even if business volume of consumers of these two age groups were equal in the past decade, this is not necessary that all other factors that influence purchasing behavior of people will remain constant. For instance, retail sales depend heavily on factors such as economic circumstances, people’s consuming desire etc. Besides this, the argument ignores the possibility that the purchasing trend of consumers might change drastically in next decade. Younger consumers might prefer to shop in departmental stores than in other types of stores, and middle-aged consumers might turn to other types of stores, too. This will lead to higher expenditure of younger consumers in departmental stores than that of middle-aged consumers.
Finally, in recommending that department stores replace products that attract younger consumers with products more suitable to middle-aged consumers, the author assumes the number of younger consumers will not increase in the next decade. Since a sizeable increase in the number of younger consumers can conceivably offset the difference in the current purchasing patterns of middle-aged and younger consumers, it would be unwise to make the recommended inventory adjustment lacking any evidence to support the claim. 
In conclusion, the argument is not convincing as it stands. The evidence in support of the conclusion does little to prove the conclusion since it does not address the above-mentioned assumptions. The argument could have been strengthened by explicitly stating that absolute amounts and business volumes of expenditure of both consumer groups are same and comparable. Additionally, the author have to demonstrate that other key factors affecting consumers’ purchasing decisions and the number of younger consumers would remain constant over the next decade.

daagh · Answer

https://gmatclub.com/forum/please-rate- ... 26618.html

The following is the response I gave to one of the essays. Much of it holds good for many of our GMAT Argument essays. One may judiciously use the contents to enrich one’s essays I GMAT

daagh
_____

minustark · Answer

Sir, thank you for your kind response. But, the link is showing 404 error.

Renzo92 · Answer

6/6 or 5/6 at least

Although, you could simplify your line of reasoning to make it easier for the test taker to understand your points.

Nmba2021 · Answer

"On average, middle-aged consumers devote 39 percent of their retail expenditure to department store products and services, while for younger consumers the average is only 25 percent. Since the number of middle-aged people will increase dramatically within the next decade, department stores can expect retail sales to increase significantly during that period. Furthermore, to take advantage of the trend, these stores should begin to replace some of those products intended to attract the younger consumer with products intended to attract the middle-aged consumer."
Discuss how well reasoned you find this argument. In your discussion, be sure to analyze the line of reasoning and the use of evidence in the argument. For example, you may need to consider what questionable assumptions underlie the thinking and what alternative explanations or counterexamples might weaken the conclusion. You can also discuss what sort of evidence would strengthen or refute the argument, what changes in the argument would make it more logically sound, and what, if anything, would help you better evaluate its conclusion.

The argument claims that retail stores should realise increased profits because average middle aged consumers spend a high percent of their retail expenditure at department stores and the number of middle aged people are likely to increase in the coming years. Further, the argument suggests that the retail stores should introduce more products for middle aged people. The argument present is flawed as it uses limited evidence to draw overgeneralised claims and commits a flaw in reasoning. The argument can be improved if historical data is presented to substantiate some of the findings of the author.

Firstly, the argument states that middle aged people will continue to spend more at department stores as opposed to young people in the near future, and lead to a rise in retail sales. The author has assumed that the trends of expenditure and consumption will stay the same in the future as they are today. The author does not consider implications of several factors such as the economy and recession on consumer’s spending habits. The author could present a clearer argument after studying the historical changes in consumption patterns of both the age groups and only then estimate the retail sales in the near future.

Secondly, the argument suggests that the department stores should stock products meant to attract middle aged people as opposed to young people as the number of middle aged customers are likely to increase in the near future. The author bases this suggestion on limited evidence and false causality. The author does not take into consideration that removing products that attract young consumers will reduce their spendings further, driving down the retail income of these department stores. Additionally, the author does not present any evidence to show the benefit of keeping products that attract middle aged people in terms of the stores' profitability. The author could perform a thorough cost benefit analysis to share the benefit of replacing the products which may attract middle aged customers with the products that attract young consumers.

Lastly, the argument could further answer the following questions to establish a strong valid conclusion: The dollar spend of young customers and that of middle aged customers? The percentage increase in the number of middle aged customers? The anticipated increase in retail incomes of other department stores in other regions? The cost of attracting middle aged customers? The stickiness of the customer in comparison to its age? Detailed and substantiated answers to the above questions will plug the gap in the current argument and in sum, make the reasoning more robust.

The argument is currently weak as it draws the above conclusion based on limited evidence and puts forward suggestions based on biased analysis. The author could include more data, incorporate wider historical and comparative trends and analyse the revenue structure of the department stores in depth to resolve some of the above highlighted flaws.

bb · Answer

Please post in the proper sub forum. Thank you.

Posted from my mobile device

Prabhjot01 · Answer

kindly evaluate my answer

The given argument states that the retail expenditure to department store products and services by middle aged consumers is more than that by the younger consumers. Moreover, the number of middle aged people is expected to increase within the next decade, due to which the author concludes that the department stores should replace some of the products to attract the middle aged consumers. The argument is based on a flawed reasoning. It does not give any information about the absolute monetary value of the expenditure of the middle aged consumers and the younger consumers. Also, the author has not provided any information about the increase in the population of the younger people.

Firstly, the author has stated that the average expenditure of middle aged consumers to department store products is comparatively higher than the younger consumers. Here the author has failed to provide relevant data about the absolute monetary value of their expenditure. This could be possible that though the percentage of expenditure to the department store by the younger consumers is lower but they may be spending huge sums in retail shopping.

Secondly, the author has stated that the population of middle aged people will increase dramatically within the next decade and on this basis he calls the department stores to attract them. But the author has not said anything about the population increase of the younger people. The author has completely neglected population change of young people.

Thirdly, it can be possible that the new population of the middle aged people would not shop in the department stores. It is not certain that they will also spend large proportions of their retail expenditure to these stores as do the the middle aged people now.

Furthermore, the author has completely neglected the possibility that the reason behind less retail expenditure by younger people can be because of poor quality of products at department stores or the lack of those products and brands that they wish to shop. As such, it will not be prudent to replace the products intended to attract the younger consumers.
 
 Therefore, the argument is seriously flawed. It is weakened because of false assumptions by the author and lack of sufficient data. The argument can be strengthened by removing the discrepancies and providing relevant statistics.

Sajjad1994 · Answer

AWA Score: 5 - 5.5 out of 6

Coherence and connectivity: 5/5  
This rating corresponds to the flow of ideas and expressions from one paragraph to another. The effective use of connectives and coherence of assertive language in arguing for/against the argument is analyzed. This is deemed as one of the most important parameters.

Paragraph structure and formation: 3/5   
The structure and division of the attempt into appropriate paragraphs are evaluated. To score well on this parameter, it is important to organize the attempt into paragraphs. Preferable to follow the convention of leaving a line blank at the end of each paragraph, to make the software aware of the structure of the essay.

Vocabulary and word expression: 4/5 
This parameter rates the submitted essay on the range of relevant vocabulary possessed by the candidate basis the word and expression usage. There are no extra- points for bombastic word usage. Simple is the best form of suave!

Good Luck

Prabhjot01 · Answer

thank you for the review. can you please be more specific about the second criteria - paragraph structure and formation. and how to improve this part.

Sajjad1994 · Answer

Read the following guides to learn more about AWA. https://gmatclub.com/forum/how-to-get-6 ... 64327.html https://gmatclub.com/forum/the-gmatclub ... 36251.html Good luck!

TusharTandon · Answer

Sajjad1994

Hi Sajjad, Please get the following essay graded.

Thanks in advance.

The following appeared in the opinion column of a financial magazine.
“On average, middle-aged consumers devote 39 percent of their retail expenditure to department store products and services, while for younger consumers the average is only 25 percent. Since the number of middle-aged people will increase dramatically within the next decade, department stores can expect retail sales to increase significantly during that period. Furthermore, to take advantage of the trend, these stores should begin to replace some of those products intended to attract the younger consumer with products intended to attract the middle-aged consumer.”
Discuss how well reasoned... etc…

Essay:

As per an article published in the opinion column of a financial magazine, it has been asserted that, on average middle aged consumers devote 39 percent of their retail expenses on department store products and services, while the retail expenditure of younger consumers is only 25 percent on average. The author of the article also claims that, the population of middle aged consumer is likely to increase dramatically within the next decade. Hence department stores should deliberate to attract middle aged consumers by replacing products meant to attract young consumers, in order to take advantage of changing market dynamics. Stated in this way, the argument manipulates facts and conveys a distorted view of the situation. The argument relies on assumptions, for which no evidence is provided. The argument is rather unconvincing, given the obvious flaws.

Firstly, the argument states that, on average middle aged consumers spend 39 percent of their retail expenditure on department stores products as compared to that of young consumers, who spend on average 25 percent. This statement has a lot of logical gaps. The argument only relies on averages and percentages to bolster its reasoning without sharing any specific figures. Averages and percentages are not absolute figures and any comparison drawn on their basis is highly likely to be misleading. For instance, on average if a middle aged consumer spends 100 $ in a month on retail expenditure, then 39 percent of it would be 39 $. However, if a young consumer spends on average 200 $ on retail expenditure, then 25 percent of it is 50 $. Hence, unless any absolute figures are shared to enable a comparison of the expenditure, it is not possible to validate the claims of the argument.

Additionally, the argument claims that the middle aged consumers’ population will dramatically increase within the next decade. This statement is a stretch and not substantiated in any way. The argument shares no information about how it arrived at this conclusion. If the author has referred any recent consensus conducted by the government, then the claims of the argument can be accepted. However, if the author has referred any report, which cannot be authenticated, then the argument holds no water.

Last but not the least, the argument makes a suggestion that department stores should replace products intended to attract young consumers with those products, which are meant to attract middle aged consumers. This line of reasoning is flawed. The argument overlooks a possibility that the preferences of consumers does not remain constant and are subject to change. There are numerous examples in real business world, wherein organisations were forced to change their business strategies on the basis of ever changing consumer preferences. Hence, without taking cognizance of this possibility, the business of departmental stores might get negatively impacted.
 
Thus, the argument has several glaring logical discrepancies. It started on a sound premise, but lacked necessary data to bolster it reasoning. If the argument had drawn upon imperative data and other possibilities as mentioned above and thereby plugged holes in the reasoning, it would have been far sounder on the whole.

Sajjad1994 · Answer

AWA Score: 5.5 out of 6

Coherence and connectivity: 5/5  
This rating corresponds to the flow of ideas and expressions from one paragraph to another. The effective use of connectives and coherence of assertive language in arguing for/against the argument is analyzed. This is deemed as one of the most important parameters.

Paragraph structure and formation: 3.5/5   
The structure and division of the attempt into appropriate paragraphs are evaluated. To score well on this parameter, it is important to organize the attempt into paragraphs. Preferable to follow the convention of leaving a line blank at the end of each paragraph, to make the software aware of the structure of the essay.

Vocabulary and word expression: 4/5 
This parameter rates the submitted essay on the range of relevant vocabulary possessed by the candidate basis the word and expression usage. There are no extra- points for bombastic word usage. Simple is the best form of suave!

Good Luck

mariachiarafico · Answer

Hello, could someone give grade and comment my essay? Thanks

The argument begins with the comparison between middle-aged and younger consumers. It reports that, on average, middle-aged tend to devote 39% of their retail expenditure to department store products and services, while, on the other hand, younger consumers devote just 25%. The writer goes on by asserting that, thanks to previsions about the number of middle-aged consumers, in 10 years from now it can be expected a significantly increase in retail sales. In addition to this, the writer claims that in order to follow this trend these stores should begin to replace younger’s consumers products with the ones of middle aged consumers. However, the conclusion of the argument relies on assumptions for which there is no clear evidence.

First, the argument readily assumes that since the number of middle-aged consumers will dramatically increase, stores can at the same time attend a higher rate of retail sales. This statement is a stretch because, first of all, it relies on the assumption of the growth of the number of middle-aged people, which is a prevision that is not based on any real number. Second of all, the expectation of the increment in retail sales is equally not based on data that could make someone think so. Even if the growth of middle-aged people was well predicted, this could as well be characterized by a less interest (and not a major one) in department store products and services.

Second, the argument claims that the department stores should follow the predicted trend and therefore start to expand the store department dedicated to middle-aged consumers by replacing the products specifically created for younger people with the ones created for middle aged consumers. This is again a very weak and unsupported claim as the argument does not demonstrate that there’s any correlation between expecting retail sales to increase and taking advantage of this by replacing the products. Since a trend it’s specifically something that could end anytime, applying this replacement could at the same time turn out to be a far too risky move. Department store’s managers should at least manage to find out whether, in case the trend could end unexpectedly, their profits would remain stable.

In conclusion, the argument is flawed for the above mentioned reasons and is therefore unconvincing. In order to assess the merits of a certain situation/decision, it is essential to have full knowledge of all contributing factors. In this particular case, the writer should have mentioned what are the data on which the previsions are made and should have studied the trend more specifically. Without these information, the argument remains unsubstantiated and open to debate.

Sajjad1994 · Answer

AWA Score: 4.5 - 5 out of 6

Coherence and connectivity: 2.5/5  
This rating corresponds to the flow of ideas and expressions from one paragraph to another. The effective use of connectives and coherence of assertive language in arguing for/against the argument is analyzed. This is deemed as one of the most important parameters.

Paragraph structure and formation: 4.5/5   
The structure and division of the attempt into appropriate paragraphs are evaluated. To score well on this parameter, it is important to organize the attempt into paragraphs. Preferable to follow the convention of leaving a line blank at the end of each paragraph, to make the software aware of the structure of the essay.

Vocabulary and word expression: 4.5/5  
This parameter rates the submitted essay on the range of relevant vocabulary possessed by the candidate basis the word and expression usage. There are no extra- points for bombastic word usage. Simple is the best form of suave!

Good Luck

On average, middle-aged consumers devote 39 percent of their retail ex

Prep Toolkit

Top 5 GMAT Debrief Videos

615 to 715 in 15 Days (Ria's Strategies)

More than Quant/Verbal Abilities: Speed vs. Accuracy

745 with Only Self-Prep and GMAT Club

From 555 to 765: 210-point Improvement

Perfect 805 Score Debrief by Julia

My Rewards