The falling revenues that the company is experiencing coincide with

Question

Hi,
Please rate my Analysis of Argument.

The following appeared in a report presented for discussion at a meeting of the directors of a company that manufactures parts for heavy machinery:
 The falling revenues that the company is experiencing coincide with delays in manufacturing. These delays, in turn, are due in large part to poor planning in purchasing metals. Consider further that the manager of the department that handles purchasing of raw materials has an excellent background in general business, psychology, and sociology, but knows little about the properties of metals. The company should, therefore, move the purchasing manager to the sales department and bring in a scientist from the research division to be manager of the purchasing department.

Discuss how well reasoned you find this argument. In your discussion be sure to analyze the line of reasoning and the use of evidence in the argument. For example, you may need to consider what questionable assumptions underlie the thinking and what alternative explanations or counterexamples might weaken the conclusion. You can also discuss what sort of evidence would strengthen or refute the argument, what changes in the argument would make it more logically sound, and what, if anything, would help you better evaluate its conclusion.

My response

The argument claims that the falling revenue of the company coincides with delays in manufacturing and these delays are because of poor planning in purchasing metals. The manager does not have the necessary scientific knowledge of the metals, which is root cause of the problem and therefore replace the manager by a scientist from the research division. Stated in this way the argument fails to mention various key factors on which it has been evaluated. It fails to mention other key factors that has contributed to the fall in revenue. The conclusion of the argument relies on various assumptions for which there are no clear evidence. Hence the argument is unconvincing and deeply flawed.

First, the argument states that falling revenue of the company is coinciding with the delays in manufacturing, thereby reasoning that the because of the delay revenue is falling. This statement is a stretch and not substantial in any way. It is possible that because the revenue is falling, there could be directions from higher management to slow down the production, which the author of the report is unaware of. So the cause and effect relation gets totally altered. Also the fall in revenue could be because of various other reasons. It is possible that the competitors have come out with better product or are selling their product cheaper than this company’s product or the market is going through a recession phase which has led to drop in the sales. We can find numerous examples with the above mentioned reason that has led to drop in revenue. The argument would have been clear and convincing if the detailed reasons with supporting evidence would have been provided.

Second, the argument assumes that the delay is caused by the poor planning in purchase of the metals. This again is a very weak and unsupported claim as the argument does not demonstrate any correlation between the delay in production and poor planning. The delay in production could be because of other reasons also. For example, it is possible that there is a bottleneck in the production line that is causing the delay. Or it is also possible that the production line is not efficient enough to support the output demand. In fact the argument should provide support why it thinks that delay is caused by the poor planning in purchase of the metals.

Finally, the argument states that the manager has a very good business knowledge, psychology and sociology. If a person has that good business knowledge he would be well aware that poor planning is causing the delay, if at all. He would surely delegate that work to an expert, the scientist in this case. Moreover the manager has much more duties along with the purchase of the metals. A scientist is good in his field, but he cannot do other tasks that a manager does, and the chances of a scientist failing in managing the purchase department is even higher.

Finally the argument concludes without doing a proper analysis of the exact reasons for the drop in revenue. Without doing an in-depth analysis by just replacing the manager might just not improve the revenue generated. Without supporting evidence of what really caused the fall in revenue, one is left with the impression that it is more of a wishful thinking rather than real cause that has caused the issue on hand.

In summary the argument is flawed and therefore unconvincing. It could be considerably strengthened by providing the supporting evidence. In order to access the merits of situation it is essential to have the full knowledge of the contributing factors.

heregoesnothing · Answer

Very well written!

I would easily grade this a 5.5 or a 6.

Keep practicing!

kuttingchai · Answer

The argument concludes that the purchasing manager should be moved to sales department and bring in a scientist from the research division to be a manager of the purchasing department. The conclusion is based on the premises that the revenues of company is declining due to delay in manufacturing. The delays in manufacturing, in turn, are due to poor planning. In addition the argument states that the purchasing manager lack knowledge about the properties of material. This argument is not convincing due to following reasons.

To begin with, the argument assumes that the delay in manufacturing due to poor planning in purchasing department is the only cause for decline in revenue. The argument overlooks other factors such as skilled labor workers, inventory of material, market conditions might also add up to poor planning in purchasing or deplay in manufacturing. The argument fails to establish casual connection between the falling revenue of the company and the deplay in manufacturing. Without compelling evidence to support the casual connection between the two events, the argument's recommendations are not worthy of consideration.

Secondly, the central assumption in the argument that the knowledge about the properties of material is essential for purchasing metals is unconvencing. No evidence is stated in the argument to support this critical assumption.

To conclude, this is a weak argument. To strengthen the conclusion that purchasing manager should be replaced, the author should provide casual connection between delay in manufacturing and decline in company's revenue. Additionally, the author would have to show that knowledge of the properties of metals is a prerequisite for planning in purchasing metals.

XCOMKing · Answer

The falling revenues would be a concern for just about any industry; in the presented argument, the author tries to allot reasons for the declining revenues of a particular company and tries to convince the company’s Board of Directors to take a particular course of action to address the situation at hand. While the author’s claim may well have merit, the author presents a poorly reasoned argument, and based solely on the evidence provided by the author, we cannot accept his conclusion as valid.

The primary issue with the argument is the use of an unsubstantiated premises to build the argument. The author’s assumption that the drop in the revenue is due to delays in manufacturing forms the basis of the entire argument and yet it is not supported by any concrete evidence. The author makes a weak attempt to support this assumption by pointing the coincidence of the time frames of the occurrence of the two events. The author assumes the causal relationship between the two events only on the basis of this observation without considering other possibilities. For instance, it is possible that the revenues are dropping due increased competition and has little to do with the delays in manufacturing.

Second, the author assumes that knowledge about the properties of material is the single most factor in proper planning for purchasing raw materials for the company. Based on this assumption, the author suggests that the procurement manager be replaced by a researcher. Though the knowledge about the properties of materials might be important for raw material procurement, it also requires certain amount of vendor management and relationship building with the supplier. Most managers will have more developed interpersonal skills and people management skills required for such a task than a researcher. Further, the manager may be assisted by an employee with the required technical knowledge or may be imparted training so that he can acquire such knowledge.

Third, the author does not talk about the availability of scientists or the interest of scientists in undergoing a shift in career. The scientists with the necessary knowledge might not be interested and even resist such a drastic career change. Besides, the scientists might be caught up with some important research for the company.

In sum, the author’s argument is based on unsupported premises and unsubstantiated assumptions and as a result the argument may not convince the Board of Directors. If the author truly hopes to change his readers' minds on the issue, he would have to largely restructure his argument, fix the flaws in his logic, clearly explicate his assumptions, and provide evidentiary support. Without these things, his poorly reasoned argument will likely convince few people.

lm93 · Answer

This report claims that in order to keep company revenues from further decline, the purchasing manager should be moved to the sales department and that a scientist from the research division should replace him. To bolster this claim, the report states the falling revenues directly coincide with delays in manufacturing, and that these delays are a result of poor planning in purchasing metal. Moreover, the report states that the current purchasing manager, though skilled in areas such as general business, psychology, and sociology, knows little about the properties of metals. Unfortunately, this argument is based on many assumptions and it would be extremely foolish for the directors to take the advice given without any further evidence. The argument in this report is weak because it assumes that falling revenues coincide with delays in manufacturing, it also assumes that the delays are largely due to poor planning in purchasing, and proposes a plan to change management roles without any evidence of how it could help.
Firstly, the argument that falling revenues directly coincide with delays in manufacturing is not substantiated in any way. The report fails to identify what the relationship is between these two variables. Without such information, the directors would not know the magnitude of the effect that manufacturing delays may have. For example, revenues can fall if prices are too low. Revenues can also fall if demand falls. Thus, there are already two other factors that could have a negative effect on revenues. Furthermore, there could be other processes in the production cycle that lead to a loss of revenues, be it high supply costs or high labor costs. 
The report makes yet another assumption that the manufacturing delays are due to poor planning in purchasing metals. Once again, this argument provides no evidence as proof. There could be many reasons for delays in manufacturing. For instance, the equipment required to manufacture the raw metals into the end outputs could be malfunctioning. Or, there could be a lack of morale amongst the workers, thus reducing total productivity and outputs. However, in order to qualify this claim, the report states that the purchasing manager has little knowledge of the properties of metals, and implies that this is the reason for purchasing delays. But, the report fails to give a description of what the role of the purchasing manager is. If the manager is solely responsible for haggling and buying metals at a cheap price, then it may not be necessary that he/she have extensive knowledge of the metals. 
Moreover, the report uses the purchasing manager’s lack of knowledge to make a proposal that could remove him/her from the position and replace him/her with a scientist. Once again, there is no evidence that this plan to replace the purchasing manager with a scientist will help keep revenues from falling. Instead, it raises serious questions as to what the true responsibilities of the purchasing manager are. Will a scientist that has enough background knowledge in metal properties be able to handle a position in which he/she may have haggle for prices? Will the company lose time in training the scientist for this position, adding to the existing delays in manufacturing? There is no evidence that the purchasing manager is fit for the sales department or that the scientist from the research department is fit to be the manager of the purchasing department. 
Seeing as there is no sound basis for the claims made by the report, it would be extremely unwise for the directors of this company to follow through with the proposed plan to replace the purchasing manager with the scientist. If the report is able to further substantiate its claims with evidence that will weaken the aforementioned flaws, then the directors can make a more accurate, well-informed decision.

redabkf · Answer

Please rate my AWA.

Souradeepk · Answer

Among the many flawed reasoning the argument rests on, the very first that will strike to any reader is the cause-effect link between the falling revenues and the delays in manufacturing. while a coincidence of events have been sited, jumping to such relationship among these events is illogical. For example, if the overall business environment is undergoing a recession leading to a reduced demand for the products, that can eventually lead to a fall in revenues as well. 
Yet going ahead with the author's logic, we will find further inconsistencies. While the argument considers poor planning in purchasing metals to be a major contributor in the delays, the authors bases her recommendation on the assumption that such planning requires knowledge of the properties of metals. by common sense, such job responsibilities require inventory management expertise rather than technica knowledge. Even if the auhor makes such assumptions, it needs to be supported by information that will necessitate the requirment of a scientist for the job. 
Secondly, the arguments also suggests an optimum allocation of its human resource based on the individual's educational background while not considering his professional experience and competency. The purchasing manager might have knowledge of sociology and psychology but performance in sales department will also depend upon other enablers like interpersonal communication skills, persuasiveness etc.
Finally, it is important to consider whether the purchasing manager's role has become tougher or difficult to execute due to the inefficiency of other departments that provides the necessary data. For example, the long and short terms forecast provided by the Sales & operations planning team might have inconsistencies with the actual demand leading to failed planning. In such cases a change of personnel might not be the appropriate action.
Thus, the arguments leaves out several key issues which bear upon the conclusion and so doesnt sound convincing. Shedding some light upon the factors discussed above as well as providing sufficient support to its underlying assumptions will make the argument more thorough and logical.

NHasan19058 · Answer

The falling revenues that the company is experiencing coincide with delays in manufacturing. These delays, in turn, are due in large part to poor planning in purchasing metals. Consider further that the manager of the department that handles purchasing of raw materials has an excellent background in general business, psychology, and sociology, but knows little about the properties of metals. The company should, therefore, move the purchasing manager to the sales department and bring in a scientist from the research division to be manager of the purchasing department.

Answer

The argument claims that the purchasing manager has no significant knowledge about properties of metals, and hence the purchasing manager should be replaced with a scientist transferring the former to the sales department. Stated in this way the argument leaves several key factors based on which the argument could be evaluated. The conclusion is based on assumptions for which there is no clear evidence. Therefore, the argument is weak, ill convincing and has several flaws.

First, the argument readily assumes that the falling revenues are due to delays in manufacturing. This statement is a stretch and not substantiated in any way. There are numerous factors for the falling revenues aside delays in manufacturing. To illustrate, the product quality of the competitors might be better and hence the customers are going for those better products. In such situation, transferring the manager to the sales department and bringing a scientist is not a well-supported idea. The argument would have been much clear if it established a correlation between falling revenues with manufacturing delays by providing proper evidence.

Second, the argument claims that the manager does not know very much about properties of metals. This, thus, suggests another reason for supplanting the current manager with a scientist. But this is again a very weak and unsupported claim as the author does not provide any information about product procurement. It might be the case that there is a team in the purchasing department that oversees the properties of metals and the team is very much efficient. In that case no benefit would come from changing the purchasing manager. If the argument provided evidence that the manager is solely responsible for the inspections of metals then the argument would be bit more convincing.

Finally, the argument concludes that the current manager should be sent to the sales department and a scientist should be placed in the purchase department. From this, it is not clear how the duo will handle their operations. If the activities in the sales department are not well managed by the manager then sales might be even slower, resulting in lower revenues. Moreover, whether scientist will be better able to inspect the properties of the metals remain totally unknown. Hence, one is left with the impression that the claim is more of a wishful thinking rather than substantive evidence. As a result, the argument has no legs to stand on.

In summary the argument is flawed and hence unconvincing. It could be strengthened considerably if the issues raised above were addressed. In order to assess the merits of a certain situation, it is essential to have the knowledge of all contributing factors.

jkrishh7 · Answer

Feedback please******************
The argument presented by the report of a meeting of directors is vague and to a greater extent unreasonable. The findings and decisions do not logically connect and hence it cannot be forecasted that it will benefit company in the future as expected.

Firstly, the report indicates that the failure in revenue is linked to delay in manufacturing and which in turn is caused by delay in purchasing. There is no consideration for other factors that may be responsible for delays such as transportation, accounting of material prior giving it to the production floor, availability of raw material, potential suppliers etc. Further no possibility for storage of raw material to warehouses in advance has been discussed which looks like a promising solution in the present scenario. Two bin system may ensure that whenever the stock reaches a critical level, a fresh purchase cab be made in cognizance with refilling time. Secondly, the statement that poor planning has resulted in delay in purchasing metal is too quick to realise and considering other factors mentioned above play a vital role. Also, what is the expected time frame of availability of material and by what margin we are presently losing out has not been substantially analysed. It may be possible that delay may have resulted due to the reason that least price vendor being located at the remotest place and a tradeoff by identifying a nearby supplier with reasonably low price can do the job. Furthermore, is removing the business managers the only solution to improve the purchasing time in light of less or poor technical knowledge? The issue may also be addressed by hiring a consultant team for guiding managers regarding quality of materials. Thirdly, the report recommends transferring business managers to the Sales department and scientists from the research department may be called in for the job. The idea neglects the fact that other than quality establishment other tasks are also carried out by purchase team such as identifying sources, price reasonability, price negotiation, financial planning, accounting etc , which can be undertaken by qualified personnel only. A scientist may not be able to carry out large part of purchasing.

The report presents views which have been finalised based on superficial and trivial facts and completely ignores the requirement of in-depth analysis. It is inescapable that the report should consider factors mentioned above prior to arriving at any final decision.

jatinmittal91 · Answer

Please rate my Analysis of Argument.

The following appeared in a report presented for discussion at a meeting of the directors of a company that manufactures parts for heavy machinery:
The falling revenues that the company is experiencing coincide with delays in manufacturing. These delays, in turn, are due in large part to poor planning in purchasing metals. Consider further that the manager of the department that handles purchasing of raw materials has an excellent background in general business, psychology, and sociology, but knows little about the properties of metals. The company should, therefore, move the purchasing manager to the sales department and bring in a scientist from the research division to be manager of the purchasing department.

Discuss how well reasoned you find this argument. In your discussion be sure to analyze the line of reasoning and the use of evidence in the argument. For example, you may need to consider what questionable assumptions underlie the thinking and what alternative explanations or counterexamples might weaken the conclusion. You can also discuss what sort of evidence would strengthen or refute the argument, what changes in the argument would make it more logically sound, and what, if anything, would help you better evaluate its conclusion.

In the argument, the author states that the company is facing fall in the revenues and delays in manufacturing at the same time. The author claims that the main cause for the delays is poor planning in purchasing metals. Moreover, the manager, who is handling the purchasing, has excellent background in General Business, Psychology, and Sociology, but does not have good knowledge of properties of metals. The author asserts that company should move the purchasing manager to the sales department and bring in a scientist from the research department to improve the situation. However, the author fails to consider that delays could have been due to falling revenues, resulting in delays in payment to the supplier of raw material, hence, poor planning in purchasing. Also, the author fails to justify whether knowledge about the properties of the material is the only quality required for the manager of purchasing department to have to plan the purchasing of metals. Therefore, the conclusion of the argument is weak/unconvincing and has several flaws.
First, the author fails to take into account the casual relationship between falling revenues and delays in manufacturing. If falling revenues were the cause of delays in manufacturing, the author conclusion would fall apart. In this case, company should try to identify the cause of falling revenues and fix the issue to resolve the issue with delays in manufacturing. The evidence provided by the author is insufficient to reach a conclusion.
Second, the author assumes that the lack of knowledge of metal would only be the cause of present delays. The author fails to provide sufficient evidence to claim that the planning of the purchasing of metals for manufacturing requires knowledge of properties of metal. The author could have provided the evidence in support of its claims that the delays have started to occur under the current manager only and the manager before the current one had the knowledge of properties of metal and there were no delays in those time.
Further, the author proposes to replace the current manager with the scientist with the knowledge of properties of metals; however, author fails to consider the other factors, which are required for purchasing metals. Hence, to strengthen the argument, the author could have assessed the causal relationship between falling revenues and delays in manufacturing. If falling revenues were the cause, the company should try to identify the cause of falling revenues and fix the issue to resolve the issue with delays in manufacturing, and if the delays in manufacturing caused by delays in purchasing metals was the main reason, and knowledge of properties of metal in a prerequisite requirement, the company could provide the some technical assistance to the manager to plan in better way.

Also please suggest ways to improve. Thank you

Foxter · Answer

Hi Guys,

I am practising for the AWA section using the Chineseburns method it would be awesome if you could please review my essay and drop-in some feedback for the same.

Argument:
The following appeared in a report presented for discussion at a meeting of the directors of a company that
manufactures parts for heavy machinery:
“The falling revenues that the company is experiencing coincide with delays in manufacturing. These delays, in turn,
are due in large part to poor planning in purchasing metals. Consider further that the manager of the department that
handles purchasing of raw materials has an excellent background in general business, psychology, and sociology,
but knows little about the properties of metals. The company should, therefore, move the purchasing manager to the
sales department and bring in a scientist from the research division to be manager of the purchasing department.”
Discuss how well reasoned . . . etc.

Essay:
The paragraph states about falling revenues of a company that manufactures parts for heavy machinery and the main reason for this is considered to be the poor planning in purchasing metals.
Due to this the manufacturing process is getting delayed. As a solution to this problem, the passage proposes to move the current purchasing manager to the sales department and bringing in a scientist from the research division. While the decision of moving the purchasing manager seems correct due to his inability of getting the desired output, the idea to bring in scientist
for the purchasing manager's job seems to be wrong due to the differences in the skill sets required for both jobs. Hence the argument is weak and fails to provide any valid method
for improving revenues for the reasons discussed below.

Firstly, The argument states that the current business manager has an excellent background in general business, psychology and sociology which are all traits of a great manager. So, it could be something else due to which the purchasing metals are getting delayed. The company should check other things as well like, whether proper requirements were shared with the current manager and how able was he in
fulfilling those.

Secondly, Knowing about the properties of metals should not be an issue here because that isn't relevant to the purchasing department. As the properties of the metal are more related to the product side of things and should be dealt with by the manufacturing department. The role of the purchasing department should be limited to procuring the required items at the best possible price to keep the costs lower.

Thirdly, The idea to bring in a scientist from the research division to be the manager of the purchasing department is completely misguiding. Since the passage does not provide any information about
the business skills of the scientist and assuming they don't have business acumen as the current manager, It could be a bad decision to bring in a person that has no understanding of business to manage purchase department.
While the scientist might bring-in knowledge about the metals with him but it is of the least relevance with the purchase side of the business as stated in the second point.

The argument fails to consider the information that the necessary specifically with the purchasing department and focuses only on the metal, which isn't that relevant to the purchase department's job making the argument very week. 
Hence the company should reconsider the plan to move the current manager and bringing-in a scientist as a replacement based on the points discussed above.

bb · Answer

5.5 For this one I think this is the best one of yours yet

Coherence and connectivity: 4.5/5 This rating corresponds to the flow of idea and expression from one paragraph to another. The effective use of connectives and coherence of assertive language in arguing for/against the argument is analysed. This is deemed as one of the most important parameters. Paragraph structure and formation: 5/5 The structure and division of the attempt into appropriate paragraphs is evaluated. To score well on this parameter, it is important to organize the attempt into paragraphs. Preferable to follow the convention of leaving a line blank at the end of each paragraph, to make the software aware of the structure of the essay. Vocabulary and word expression: 4.5/5 This parameter rates the submitted essay on the range of relevant vocaubulary possessed by the candidate basis the word and expression usage. There are no extra- points for bombastic word-usage. Simple is the best form of suave!

amr0910 · Answer

HI!
please rate this AWA. Any help/suggestion is appreciated. Thanks in advanced:)

The argument claims that since the manager of the department that handles purchasing of raw materials has little knowledge about properties of metals, there is poor planning in purchasing metals. This causes delay in manufacturing, which coincides with the falling revenue of the company. Therefore, the company should move the purchasing the manager to sales department and bring in a scientist from the research division to be the manager of purchase.
This argument is highly based on assumptions and is missing several crucial factors, which are required to evaluate the argument.

First, the argument fails to establish the correlation between the company’s failing revenues and delays in manufacturing. It assumes that just because these two events happen to coincide, delays in manufacturing in turn causes the falling revenue of the company. This assumption is baseless. These two occurrences can be caused by two separate events, or can be caused by another hidden factor that the argument fails to mention. For instance, the falling revenues can be due to the decreasing needs of parts for heavy machinery. It can also be due to higher price of the parts offered by the company. Clearly, the argument doesn’t look into all possible causes for failing revenue.

Furthermore, the argument that the poor purchasing of raw materials is due to the fact that the manager has little knowledge about properties of metals. The poor purchasing can be due to a variety of other reasons. For instance, the there may be a change in suppliers of raw materials, that caused uncertainty in purchasing. Also, it could also be due to delayed supplying of raw materials from the supplier side, due to an issue they are facing. In addition, there may be an overall shortage in the raw materials in the region. Unfortunately, the directors fail to examine all possible causes for poor planning in purchasing metals. They assume that the poor planning is due to the manager’s lack of knowledge.
Finally, the argument assumes that the making a scientist from research department the purchasing manager would be better. There are other skills required in purchasing that a scientist may or may not have. Would he/she be able to deal with suppliers? Would he /she be able to understand what is the best price for raw materials? These are some factors to be examined.

In conclusion, due to the above stated reasons, the given argument is weakly structured, and open to debate.

bb · Answer

AWA Score: 4.5 out of 6! I have used a GMATAWA auto-grader to evaluate your essay. I would suggest following the AWA template posted here

Coherence and connectivity: 4.5/5 This rating corresponds to the flow of idea and expression from one paragraph to another. The effective use of connectives and coherence of assertive language in arguing for/against the argument is analysed. This is deemed as one of the most important parameters. Paragraph structure and formation: 3/5 The structure and division of the attempt into appropriate paragraphs is evaluated. To score well on this parameter, it is important to organize the attempt into paragraphs. Preferable to follow the convention of leaving a line blank at the end of each paragraph, to make the software aware of the structure of the essay. Vocabulary and word expression: 4.5/5 This parameter rates the submitted essay on the range of relevant vocaubulary possessed by the candidate basis the word and expression usage. There are no extra- points for bombastic word-usage. Simple is the best form of suave!

Bukola001 · Answer

The author tries to justify that moving the purchasing manager to the sales department and making a scientist the purchasing manager will prevent delays in manufacturing and improve revenue, but his line of reasoning is flawed and the argument is not valid.
Poor planning in purchasing metals may not necessarily be fixed by the scientific knowledge of the scientist. The field of expertise of the scientist was not stated so we cannot tell if the scientist will be knowledgeable about properties of metals or if his contribution will improve raw materials purchase planning. Also, the apparent ignorance of the purchasing manager on properties of metals should not affect purchasing planning as companies should have laid down standards for their raw materials. The purchasing department may consist of people with the required knowledge of metals and all the purchasing manager has to do is delegate areas of the job that require specialized knowledge of metals. The author’s argument would have been valid if he had stated the real importance of the scientist’s knowledge in the improvement of planning the purchase of metals.
Moving the purchasing manager to the sales department would not solve the current problem that the company is facing, as knowledge of general business, psychology and sociology do not necessarily culminate in excellent sales skills. If the problem with delays in manufacturing is not first fixed, the purchasing manager’s background knowledge would have little effect in the sales department and the company would not note a positive change in falling revenues. If the author had indicated that poor sales also contributed to falling revenues, then his proposition to move the purchasing manager to the sales department would have held more ground.
Generally, I think that this argument is baseless and the author did not highlight crucial details that may have validated his argument.

mbab · Answer

In response to a coincidence between falling revenues and delays in manufacturing, the report recommends replacing the manager of the purchasing department. The grounds for this action are twofold. First, the delays are traced to poor planning in purchasing metals. Second, the purchasing manager’s lack of knowledge of the properties of metals is thought to be the cause of the poor planning. It is further recommended that the position of the purchasing manager be filled by a scientist from the research division and that the current purchasing manager be reassigned to the sales department. In support of this latter recommendation, the report states that the current purchasing manager’s background in general business, psychology, and sociology equip him for this new assignment. The recommendations advanced in the report are questionable for two reasons.

To begin with, the report fails to establish a causal connection between the falling revenues of the company and the delays in manufacturing. The mere fact that falling revenues coincide with delays in manufacturing is insufficient to conclude that the delays caused the decline in revenue. Without compelling evidence to support the causal connection between these two events, the report’s recommendations are not worthy of consideration.

Second, a central assumption of the report is that knowledge of the properties of metals is necessary for planning in purchasing metals. No evidence is stated in the report to support this crucial assumption. Moreover, it is not obvious that such knowledge would be required to perform this task. Since planning is essentially a logistical function, it is doubtful that in-depth knowledge of the properties of metals would be helpful in accomplishing this task.

Finally, the argument states that the manager has a very good business knowledge, psychology and sociology. If a person has that good business knowledge he would be well aware that poor planning is causing the delay, if at all. He would surely delegate that work to an expert, the scientist in this case. Moreover the manager has much more duties along with the purchase of the metals. A scientist is good in his field, but he cannot do other tasks that a manager does, and the chances of a scientist failing in managing the purchase department is even higher.

In summary the argument is flawed and therefore unconvincing. It could be considerably strengthened by providing the supporting evidence. In order to access the merits of situation it is essential to have the full knowledge of the contributing factors.

Sajjad1994 · Answer

AWA Score: 5 out of 6

Coherence and connectivity: 4.5/5 
This rating corresponds to the flow of ideas and expressions from one paragraph to another. The effective use of connectives and coherence of assertive language in arguing for/against the argument is analyzed. This is deemed as one of the most important parameters.

Paragraph structure and formation: 4.5/5 
The structure and division of the attempt into appropriate paragraphs are evaluated. To score well on this parameter, it is important to organize the attempt into paragraphs. Preferable to follow the convention of leaving a line blank at the end of each paragraph, to make the software aware of the structure of the essay.

Vocabulary and word expression: 4/5 
This parameter rates the submitted essay on the range of relevant vocabulary possessed by the candidate basis the word and expression usage. There are no extra- points for bombastic word usage. Simple is the best form of suave!

Good Luck

Himan2209 · Answer

Hi  Sajjad1994 ,

Please help evaluate my AWA:

The argument claims that the company’s falling revenue can be attributed to delays in manufacturing and sole reason for that delay due to poor planning and that is because of the manager handling department. It concludes that manager should be moved from his job to improve situation in the company. Stated in this way, the argument fails to mention several key factors, on the basis of which it could be evaluated.The conclusion of the argument relies heavily on certain assumptions for which there is no evidence. Hence, the argument is weak and has several flaws.

First, the argument readily assumes that decline in revenue can be only because of delay in manufacturing. This argument is a stretch since it avoids multiple factors involved in revenue generation. For example, there could be the reason that the demand got declined, which in turn has slowed down revenue generation. Clearly, decline in demand will have an impact on manufacturing speed as well as revenue. The argument could have been much clearer if it would have stated clearly that slowness in manufacturing is the only reason for decline in revenue.

Second, the argument claims that moving the manager handling procurement to another department would help in increasing revenue.This argument is weak and unsupported as the argument doesn’t demonstrate correlation between manager’s expertise and poor planning of the raw materials. While the manager handles purchasing of raw materials, there are high chances of planning being done by other team and in turn instructs the manager and his team to procure. The argument could have been more strong if there would have been an evidence of planning is being handled by the team purchasing the raw material.

Finally, the argument has certain assumptions of the reason for the decline of revenue and ignores other factors and scenarios and doesn’t provide evidence to support claims. Without convincing answers to these questions, the argument remains more of a wishful thinking rather than the substantial evidence.

In conclusion, the argument is unconvincing for the above mentioned reasons and could be strengthened if the author clearly mentions all relevant facts. Without this information, the argument remains unsubstantiated and open to debate.

Sajjad1994 · Answer

AWA Score: 5.5 - 6 out of 6

Coherence and connectivity: 5/5  
This rating corresponds to the flow of ideas and expressions from one paragraph to another. The effective use of connectives and coherence of assertive language in arguing for/against the argument is analyzed. This is deemed as one of the most important parameters.

Paragraph structure and formation: 4/5  
The structure and division of the attempt into appropriate paragraphs are evaluated. To score well on this parameter, it is important to organize the attempt into paragraphs. Preferable to follow the convention of leaving a line blank at the end of each paragraph, to make the software aware of the structure of the essay.

Vocabulary and word expression: 4.5/5  
This parameter rates the submitted essay on the range of relevant vocabulary possessed by the candidate basis the word and expression usage. There are no extra- points for bombastic word usage. Simple is the best form of suave!

Good Luck

TusharTandon · Answer

Hi  Sajjad1994 , would appreacite if you could evaluate my essay.

The following appeared in a report presented for discussion at a meeting of the directors of a company that manufactures parts for heavy machinery:
The falling revenues that the company is experiencing coincide with delays in manufacturing. These delays, in turn, are due in large part to poor planning in purchasing metals. Consider further that the manager of the department that handles purchasing of raw materials has an excellent background in general business, psychology, and sociology, but knows little about the properties of metals. The company should, therefore, move the purchasing manager to the sales department and bring in a scientist from the research division to be manager of the purchasing department.

Essay:
The report presented to the directors in a meeting of the manufacturing company concludes that, the cause of falling revenues is delay in manufactoring which in turn is caused by poor planning in purchasing the raw materials. Basis this analogy, the author recommends that the manager of the purchase department should be moved to the sales department and a scientist from the reasearch department should be given the responsibility of managing procurement of raw material, considering the fact that the sceintist would have in dept knowledge of properties of metals as compared to that of purchase manager. Stated in this way, the argument manipulates facts and conveys a distorted view of the situation. The conclusion of the argument relies on assumptions, for which evidence has not been provided. The argument is rather unconvincing, given the obvious flaws.

Firstly, the argument establishes an illogical causality between falling revenues and delay in manufacturing. This is a week and flawed reasoning. There are several factors which could be responsible for dimishing revenues, such as economic recession, a temporary slump in the market, increased competition, spurious quality of products etc. The argument does not provides any information about the analysis of these factors, without which the reasoning of the argument stands questioned.

Secondly, the argument readily assumes poor planning in purchasing raw materials as the only possible factor, causing delay in manufacturing. This argument again has a lot of logical gaps. It does not takes into account other possible causes of manufacturing delays. It is possible that the manufacturing process is a complex and a onerous task and hence occational delays are inevitable. It is also possible that the technology of machinery used in manufacturing process is obsolete which causes frequent machinery breakdowns, causing manufacturing delays. Hence, without considering these factors, it is not logical to consider the flaw in purchase department as the only cause of manufacturing delays.

Finally, the argument makes an illogical recommendation that the purchase maanger should be transferred to the sales team and a scientist from the research team should be given the task of managing procurement. This line of argument is erroneous. Managing procurement requires an individual to posses various skills such as effective communication and negotiation skills, sound management skillls along with an ability to understand the thought process and psychology of suppliers and other intermediaries involved in the procurement process, whereas a basic knowledge of the raw material suffices. However, a scientist might have a sound knowledge of the properties of metals but that is not sufficient to perform the task of procurement. Since, the current manager posseses all these skills as listed above, hence it would not be a wise decision to shift him in other department. Additionally, without contemplating on other possible causes of issues in the procurement, transferring an employee to other department also hampers the moral of other employees as well. Collectively, these factors won’t benefit the company as a whole.

Thus, the argument has several glaring logical gaps. It started with a sound premise but lacked necessary data and logical reasoning to strenghten the premise. If the argument had drawn upon the above mentioned possibilites and filled the holes in the reasoning, then it would have been far sounder as a whole.

The falling revenues that the company is experiencing coincide with

Prep Toolkit

Top 5 GMAT Debrief Videos

615 to 715 in 15 Days (Ria's Strategies)

More than Quant/Verbal Abilities: Speed vs. Accuracy

745 with Only Self-Prep and GMAT Club

From 555 to 765: 210-point Improvement

Perfect 805 Score Debrief by Julia

My Rewards