https://gmatclub.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2015/06/2015-06-16_19-29-30-150x150.png By Adam Hoff, Amerasia Consulting Group This is a post I write basically every year because it comes from what I'm seeing each round, every day, on basically every application. That drum beat is really rigid, hard-to-read Why School X sections on essays. I give the same note to every single client so now I'm giving it to everybody: the simplest and most important thing you can do to improve your Why School X portion of career goals essay is to personalize any and all content. This is a great way to avoid writing something off-putting, as well as a quick and easy method for making your essays warmer, more personal, and easier to connect with. So, what do I mean by "personalizing" this part of the app? Simple: make anything you write about the school specific to you, your experience, your desires, or what you require from a program. Never just state absolutes, generalities, or even known truths and facts - always make them personally-held viewpoints. Examples are the best way to understand this (after the jump): Example #1 GOOD - "I am seeking an intense MBA experience, which is why INSEAD is my top choice." BAD - "INSEAD is one of the most intense MBA programs in the world." WHY - The first sentence is a statement about what you want (an intense experience), which is used as justification for pursuing the school. It doesn't matter whether you are right or wrong in your assessment, so long as you believe it and can then base a decision on that belief. Whereas in the second sentence, you are simply stating a fact. There are multiple problems with this: A) you might be wrong, B) even if you are right it might sound lecturing (which can irritate a reader who is far more of an expert on the subject than you are), or C) even if you are right and the reader is not mildly irritated, you still miss a chance to express something about you. Anything in any essay that doesn't tell the reader more about you, your world, and what you want is wasted space. Example #2 Good - "One thing that drew me to Duke right away was the small class size, which has always been the ideal setting for me to grow and learn." BAD - "Small class sizes are the best way to learn, which is why I love Duke." WHY - This one has a wrinkle, which is that the "bad" sentence sort of seems to personalize the statement with the "why I love Duke" part. The problem is that the revelation is still not based on a personal belief, but rather a statement of fact. Indeed, this statement of fact is even more egregious than the INSEAD statement above because it's offering up as concrete fact something that is highly debatable. Maybe large classes are the best way to learn. Maybe it's online. Maybe it's one-on-one. Who are you to say? Who am I to say? None of us are experts in the sphere of ideal learning models, so this just sounds completely arrogant. Whereas in the "good" example, we see that it's simply a personal preference that is the basis for further interest in Duke. I could go on and on and write 10 examples, but two is probably enough. The main thing is to read every single sentence you write about a program and make sure that it's always personal - told from your perspective, your opinion, your beliefs, and your desires. If it dissolves into "brochure writing" - just statements of fact, no matter how benign or flattering to the school - there is zero upside and plenty of downside. It's a small thing, but we see it crop up in probably 90% of the essays we read, so it's obviously a fairly widespread problem. And while it may not be the entire difference between being admitted or denied, it can definitely be the difference between getting a good or a bad read of your file. And in our experience, *that* is often the difference between being admitted or denied. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- If you are interested in making sure your essays are personalized (as well as everything else they need to be), hit us up at mba@amerasiaconsulting.com .

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FROM Insead Admissions Blog: My MBA internship with Agastya – one of the largest non-profits in India

Before coming to INSEAD in January 2017, as I was preparing for a year filled with extraordinary experiences, I made a promise to myself – This is the year to be brave, to think about the long term, and to... Continue Reading →

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FROM Insead Admissions Blog: The B-School “Bubble” Effect

B-schools are particularly well known for their all-consuming, high-pressure, and demanding environment, filled with ambitious young professionals. But is that all it is? What else is there in the B-school bubble? When I first talked about the B-school bubble,... Continue Reading →

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FROM Insead Admissions Blog: A Journey to Angola

When I left Brazil to come to INSEAD, I knew that I was going to have a year full of diverse and multicultural experiences. Yet, back then it would be hard for me to imagine that six months later I... Continue Reading →

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FROM Insead Admissions Blog: I thought my MBA Application CV was perfect, but I was wrong

I still remember the painful times during my application when I needed to write my CV. It was probably the document that I had read the most in my life – I didn’t count exactly how many times I did... Continue Reading →

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FROM Insead Admissions Blog: How do I find my dream job?

What you want to be when you grow up? What you want to study in your undergrad? Where are you going to work? It’s very suddenly, for many people, that the choice of work loses connection with their dreams. Why?... Continue Reading →

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02 Oct 2017, 19:00

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FROM Insead Admissions Blog: Gender Diversity

This academic year coincides with the 50th anniversary of the first two female graduates from INSEAD’s MBA Programme. INSEAD is planning a yearlong series of events around IW50 (INSEAD Women 50) that will highlight women in business, INSEAD’s gender diversity,... Continue Reading →

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FROM Insead Admissions Blog: The First 30 Days…A Reflection!

So wow. How do I begin to describe the last (and my first) month at INSEAD? Let me begin by telling you it’s doesn’t feel like a month – I’d say a solid three-four at least. The time dilation... Continue Reading →

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FROM Insead Admissions Blog: My summer time in Uganda

I have always been excited about exploring foreign lands and working in a startup. When SPOUTS of Water, a rapidly growing early-revenue-stage social enterprise that manufactures and distributes ceramic water filters in Uganda offered me the opportunity to go to... Continue Reading →

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Hi..does INSEAD consider studying in a foreign University (French to be precise) during an exchange program for 3 months International Experience ?

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FROM Insead Admissions Blog: 3 things to bring to INSEAD

The first five weeks at INSEAD have flown by so fast that I feel I need an Alcubierre drive to keep up. The Alcubierre drive was something I didn’t even know existed before I talked with my classmate from NASA. In... Continue Reading →

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FROM Insead Admissions Blog: Reflections two-thirds into P1

I remember quite well my first day of school in the US. I was almost eight years old, and had only moved a month prior after growing up most of my life in Brussels. Despite months of anticipation and excitement... Continue Reading →

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FROM Insead Admissions Blog: Key to essay writing – What does it mean to “be yourself”?

When applying to INSEAD, the piece of advice I received most was “be yourself”. It took me months to fully understand the meaning of it, but I am now convinced that it is the best possible guidance for INSEAD applicants.... Continue Reading →

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FROM Insead Admissions Blog: Social Enterprise Awards at INSEAD

The Fontainebleau campus is enjoying sunny days and the MBA July ’18 Class is already close to finishing their first Period on the Programme. It seems that just not that long ago they were just preparing to embark on their... Continue Reading →

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FROM Insead Admissions Blog: INSEAD experience: 4 for 1

When I visited INSEAD for the first time almost four years ago, I was pregnant with my daughter, Jeanne. Augustin, my son, lived the MBA Application from inside since I was pregnant with him during the GMAT, the application essays... Continue Reading →

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FROM Insead Admissions Blog: Onwards and Upwards

And like a flash, we are done with P1, i.e. our first academic period, i.e. one of the most intense two-month periods of my life. Highlights from this (very short) timespan include: a million and a half group meetings and... Continue Reading →

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FROM Insead Admissions Blog: Don’t Let the Turkeys Get You Down!

When I was a little girl, I remember my father getting a birthday card from my grandmother, his mother. The card featured an exasperated elephant with turkeys along his back, on his trunk, and on his hump and was drawn... Continue Reading →

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FROM Insead Admissions Blog: Musings from P1

It’s been a little over two months since I first stepped foot into INSEAD, and here we are: the last day of final exams. To say that time has flown by quickly is an understatement. As I look back at... Continue Reading →

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FROM Insead Admissions Blog: Tell me your story, Daniella

The INSEAD Women in Business Club have launched a « Tell your story » initiative across both the Singapore and Fontainebleau campuses that aims to present the current INSEAD MBA female students’ inspirational life-stories. This is the story of Daniela Mordetzki, MBA... Continue Reading →

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FROM Insead Admissions Blog: 3 Things I Learnt From My Relationship With an MBA Student

Being in a relationship with an MBA student (or B-schooler) is like one of those things when people say, “You have nothing to worry about,” but what they actually mean is, “Nothing can prepare you for this.” So simply the... Continue Reading →

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FROM Insead Admissions Blog: Summer Internship with Startup Farmers

Startup Farmers Founded by INSEAD Alum Romain Sautrau (’12D), Startup Farmers is a venture capital fund and startup accelerator based in Paris, France that is dedicated to solving the challenges of feeding a growing population in an environmentally sustainable way.... Continue Reading →