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25 Feb 2022, 22:35
Kudos
Bookmarks
Hello everyone,
Today i wrote my first awa practice essay.Although there are many sample solution available on the internet for this argument but i would be highly obliged if I can get first hand review on my interpretation of the topic.
The following appeared as part of an annual report sent to stockholders by Olympic Foods, a processor of frozen foods:
“Over time, the costs of processing go down because as organizations learn how to do things better, they become more efficient. In color film processing, for example, the cost of a 3-by-5-inch print fell from 50 cents for five-day service in 1970 to 20 cents for one-day service in 1984. The same principle applies to the processing of food. And since Olympic Foods will soon celebrate its 25th birthday, we can expect that our long experience will enable us to minimize costs and thus maximize profits.”
Discuss how well reasoned you find this argument. In your discussion be sure to analyze the line of reasoning and the use of evidence in the argument. For example, you may need to consider what questionable assumptions underlie the thinking and what alternative explanations or counterexamples might weaken the conclusion. You can also discuss what sort of evidence would strengthen or refute the argument, what changes in the argument would make it more logically sound, and what, if anything, would help you better evaluate its conclusion.
The argument claims that with time the cost of processing decline as organisations learn to do things efficiently.Stated in this way the argument fails to mention several key factors on which it could be evaluated.The conclusion of the argument relies on assumptions for which there is no clear evidence.Hence,the argument is weak/unconvincing and has several flaws.
First the argument readily assumes that with time the processing cost decreases as efficiency increases.This statement is a stretch and unsubstantiated.For example:With usage of advanced technology the cost of 3 by 5 inch print fell from 50 cents to 20 cents over time.But on contrary this is not the case with the food industry. With time, more efficient approaches are being invented to improve food quality but that does not imply that processing cost decreased .The argument could have been much clearer if it explicitly stated the trend of processing cost in the food industry.
Secondly,the argument claims that the same principle of processing cost implies to both food and colour film processing industry.However these two industries are totally different.If the argument had provided evidence that there are similarities between the two industries then the argument could have been a lot more convincing.
Finally,the argument claims that the Olympic Foods with its 25years of experience in food industry will be able to minimise costs and thus increase profits.However,it cannot be stated that with decrease in cost, profits will increase as the profitability of a business depends on several factors apart from cost only.
In conclusion,the argument is flawed for the above mentioned reasons and is therefore unconvincing.Inorder to asses the merits of a certain situation,it is essential to have full knowledge of all contributing factors.
Kindly asses my essay and grade me out of 6.0(as in GMAT exam).Please suggest how I can improve and where I am making mistake.
Your help will be much appreciated.
Today i wrote my first awa practice essay.Although there are many sample solution available on the internet for this argument but i would be highly obliged if I can get first hand review on my interpretation of the topic.
The following appeared as part of an annual report sent to stockholders by Olympic Foods, a processor of frozen foods:
“Over time, the costs of processing go down because as organizations learn how to do things better, they become more efficient. In color film processing, for example, the cost of a 3-by-5-inch print fell from 50 cents for five-day service in 1970 to 20 cents for one-day service in 1984. The same principle applies to the processing of food. And since Olympic Foods will soon celebrate its 25th birthday, we can expect that our long experience will enable us to minimize costs and thus maximize profits.”
Discuss how well reasoned you find this argument. In your discussion be sure to analyze the line of reasoning and the use of evidence in the argument. For example, you may need to consider what questionable assumptions underlie the thinking and what alternative explanations or counterexamples might weaken the conclusion. You can also discuss what sort of evidence would strengthen or refute the argument, what changes in the argument would make it more logically sound, and what, if anything, would help you better evaluate its conclusion.
The argument claims that with time the cost of processing decline as organisations learn to do things efficiently.Stated in this way the argument fails to mention several key factors on which it could be evaluated.The conclusion of the argument relies on assumptions for which there is no clear evidence.Hence,the argument is weak/unconvincing and has several flaws.
First the argument readily assumes that with time the processing cost decreases as efficiency increases.This statement is a stretch and unsubstantiated.For example:With usage of advanced technology the cost of 3 by 5 inch print fell from 50 cents to 20 cents over time.But on contrary this is not the case with the food industry. With time, more efficient approaches are being invented to improve food quality but that does not imply that processing cost decreased .The argument could have been much clearer if it explicitly stated the trend of processing cost in the food industry.
Secondly,the argument claims that the same principle of processing cost implies to both food and colour film processing industry.However these two industries are totally different.If the argument had provided evidence that there are similarities between the two industries then the argument could have been a lot more convincing.
Finally,the argument claims that the Olympic Foods with its 25years of experience in food industry will be able to minimise costs and thus increase profits.However,it cannot be stated that with decrease in cost, profits will increase as the profitability of a business depends on several factors apart from cost only.
In conclusion,the argument is flawed for the above mentioned reasons and is therefore unconvincing.Inorder to asses the merits of a certain situation,it is essential to have full knowledge of all contributing factors.
Kindly asses my essay and grade me out of 6.0(as in GMAT exam).Please suggest how I can improve and where I am making mistake.
Your help will be much appreciated.
26 Feb 2022, 08:59
Kudos
Bookmarks
AWA Score: 5 out of 6
I have used a GMAT AWA auto-grader to evaluate your essay.
Coherence and connectivity: 5/5
This rating corresponds to the flow of ideas and expressions from one paragraph to another. The effective use of connectives and coherence of assertive language in arguing for/against the argument is analyzed. This is deemed as one of the most important parameters.
Paragraph structure and formation: 3/5
The structure and division of the attempt into appropriate paragraphs are evaluated. To score well on this parameter, it is important to organize the attempt into paragraphs. Preferable to follow the convention of leaving a line blank at the end of each paragraph, to make the software aware of the structure of the essay.
Vocabulary and word expression: 4.5/5
This parameter rates the submitted essay on the range of relevant vocabulary possessed by the candidate basis the word and expression usage. There are no extra- points for bombastic word usage. Simple is the best form of suave!
I have used a GMAT AWA auto-grader to evaluate your essay.
Coherence and connectivity: 5/5
This rating corresponds to the flow of ideas and expressions from one paragraph to another. The effective use of connectives and coherence of assertive language in arguing for/against the argument is analyzed. This is deemed as one of the most important parameters.
Paragraph structure and formation: 3/5
The structure and division of the attempt into appropriate paragraphs are evaluated. To score well on this parameter, it is important to organize the attempt into paragraphs. Preferable to follow the convention of leaving a line blank at the end of each paragraph, to make the software aware of the structure of the essay.
Vocabulary and word expression: 4.5/5
This parameter rates the submitted essay on the range of relevant vocabulary possessed by the candidate basis the word and expression usage. There are no extra- points for bombastic word usage. Simple is the best form of suave!
-Introduction is weak but conclusion is strong
-Lots of typing error are there that needs attention.
Good Luck
ANKITA3007
Hello everyone,
Today i wrote my first awa practice essay.Although there are many sample solution available on the internet for this argument but i would be highly obliged if I can get first hand review on my interpretation of the topic.
The following appeared as part of an annual report sent to stockholders by Olympic Foods, a processor of frozen foods:
“Over time, the costs of processing go down because as organizations learn how to do things better, they become more efficient. In color film processing, for example, the cost of a 3-by-5-inch print fell from 50 cents for five-day service in 1970 to 20 cents for one-day service in 1984. The same principle applies to the processing of food. And since Olympic Foods will soon celebrate its 25th birthday, we can expect that our long experience will enable us to minimize costs and thus maximize profits.”
Discuss how well reasoned you find this argument. In your discussion be sure to analyze the line of reasoning and the use of evidence in the argument. For example, you may need to consider what questionable assumptions underlie the thinking and what alternative explanations or counterexamples might weaken the conclusion. You can also discuss what sort of evidence would strengthen or refute the argument, what changes in the argument would make it more logically sound, and what, if anything, would help you better evaluate its conclusion.
The argument claims that with time the cost of processing decline as organisations learn to do things efficiently.Stated in this way the argument fails to mention several key factors on which it could be evaluated.The conclusion of the argument relies on assumptions for which there is no clear evidence.Hence,the argument is weak/unconvincing and has several flaws.
First the argument readily assumes that with time the processing cost decreases as efficiency increases.This statement is a stretch and unsubstantiated.For example:With usage of advanced technology the cost of 3 by 5 inch print fell from 50 cents to 20 cents over time.But on contrary this is not the case with the food industry. With time, more efficient approaches are being invented to improve food quality but that does not imply that processing cost decreased .The argument could have been much clearer if it explicitly stated the trend of processing cost in the food industry.
Secondly,the argument claims that the same principle of processing cost implies to both food and colour film processing industry.However these two industries are totally different.If the argument had provided evidence that there are similarities between the two industries then the argument could have been a lot more convincing.
Finally,the argument claims that the Olympic Foods with its 25years of experience in food industry will be able to minimise costs and thus increase profits.However,it cannot be stated that with decrease in cost, profits will increase as the profitability of a business depends on several factors apart from cost only.
In conclusion,the argument is flawed for the above mentioned reasons and is therefore unconvincing.Inorder to asses the merits of a certain situation,it is essential to have full knowledge of all contributing factors.
Kindly asses my essay and grade me out of 6.0(as in GMAT exam).Please suggest how I can improve and where I am making mistake.
Your help will be much appreciated.
Today i wrote my first awa practice essay.Although there are many sample solution available on the internet for this argument but i would be highly obliged if I can get first hand review on my interpretation of the topic.
The following appeared as part of an annual report sent to stockholders by Olympic Foods, a processor of frozen foods:
“Over time, the costs of processing go down because as organizations learn how to do things better, they become more efficient. In color film processing, for example, the cost of a 3-by-5-inch print fell from 50 cents for five-day service in 1970 to 20 cents for one-day service in 1984. The same principle applies to the processing of food. And since Olympic Foods will soon celebrate its 25th birthday, we can expect that our long experience will enable us to minimize costs and thus maximize profits.”
Discuss how well reasoned you find this argument. In your discussion be sure to analyze the line of reasoning and the use of evidence in the argument. For example, you may need to consider what questionable assumptions underlie the thinking and what alternative explanations or counterexamples might weaken the conclusion. You can also discuss what sort of evidence would strengthen or refute the argument, what changes in the argument would make it more logically sound, and what, if anything, would help you better evaluate its conclusion.
The argument claims that with time the cost of processing decline as organisations learn to do things efficiently.Stated in this way the argument fails to mention several key factors on which it could be evaluated.The conclusion of the argument relies on assumptions for which there is no clear evidence.Hence,the argument is weak/unconvincing and has several flaws.
First the argument readily assumes that with time the processing cost decreases as efficiency increases.This statement is a stretch and unsubstantiated.For example:With usage of advanced technology the cost of 3 by 5 inch print fell from 50 cents to 20 cents over time.But on contrary this is not the case with the food industry. With time, more efficient approaches are being invented to improve food quality but that does not imply that processing cost decreased .The argument could have been much clearer if it explicitly stated the trend of processing cost in the food industry.
Secondly,the argument claims that the same principle of processing cost implies to both food and colour film processing industry.However these two industries are totally different.If the argument had provided evidence that there are similarities between the two industries then the argument could have been a lot more convincing.
Finally,the argument claims that the Olympic Foods with its 25years of experience in food industry will be able to minimise costs and thus increase profits.However,it cannot be stated that with decrease in cost, profits will increase as the profitability of a business depends on several factors apart from cost only.
In conclusion,the argument is flawed for the above mentioned reasons and is therefore unconvincing.Inorder to asses the merits of a certain situation,it is essential to have full knowledge of all contributing factors.
Kindly asses my essay and grade me out of 6.0(as in GMAT exam).Please suggest how I can improve and where I am making mistake.
Your help will be much appreciated.
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