Please rate my essay! Any feedback would be appreciated!

Dear Mr. Daagh,

Would I be able to bug you to rate one last AWA for me please? I would be so grateful! This one is from the official GMAT practice test I took and I felt a bit constrained for time, which explains the many typos

Prompt:
"Motorcycle X has been manufactured in the United States for more than 70 years. Although one foreign company has copied the motorcycle and is selling it for less, the company has failed to attract motorcycle X customers-some say because its product lacks the exceptionally loud noise made by motorcycle X. But there must be some other explanation. After all, foreign cars tend to be quieter than similar American-made cars, but they sell at least as well. Also, television advertisements for motorcycle X highlight its durability and sleek lines, not its noisiness, and the ads typically have voice-overs or rock music rather than engine-roar on the sound track."

Discuss how well reasoned you find this argument. In your discussion be sure to analyze the line of reasoning and the use of evidence in the argument. For example, you may need to consider what questionable assumptions underlie the thinking and what alternative explanations or counterexamples might weaken the conclusion. You can also discuss what sort of evidence would strengthen or refute the argument, what changes in the argument would make it more logically sound, and what, if anything, would help you better evaluate its conclusion.


Response:
In the above article, the author expresses mistrust in the theory that motorcycle X’s comparable foreign model has failed to garner insterest among consumers, as it is not as noisy as the American version. The authour's line of reasoning is weak and not founded in verifiable data.

First, the authoe draws a weak analogy between the sale of American-made cars, compared to that of tehir foreign counterparts. This is a poor analogy as the consumer base for cars might be significantly different from that of motorcycles. While the former might also be a much larger and more varied than the latter, considering that typically there are many more cars on the road than motorbikes and that car models and manufacturers significantly outnumber the same for motorbikes. Furthermore, the consumer preferences when considering a car are presumably quite different than those while selecting a motorcylce as a means of transportation. Thus, it can safely be said that the consumer preference, and the related sales figures, for American-made versus foreign cars cannot be compared to those for motorcycles.

Second, the author makes the assumption that the festures of a motorcycle that are highlighted in advertising correspond directly with the preferences of the consumers. For example, while a shampoo commercial highlights the ability of the product to eliminate dandruff, consumers purchasing it might be buying it because it is sold at an affordable price or because it is more wildely available in stores, and not necessarily because it alleviates dandruff. Thus, the author's mistakenly interpret's the features of motorcycle X highlighted in its advertisements as being the only features customers buying the model value in it.

Lastly, it is safe to say that the author's argument lacks direct, statistical evidence from verifiable data to back the theory that there be some other explanation for motorcycle X's success compared to its foreign competition. For example, if the author could research or implement actual consumer surveys for the current owners of motorcycle X to directly determine the reasons for their brand loyalty to the American manufacturer of the motorcycle. Their responses could provide a verifiable means by which to evaluate the author's arguments. They coule, perhaps, provide even deeper insight into the consumer preferences when it comes to purchasing motorcycle x.

In sum, the author of this article uses weak assumptions, a faulty analogy, and little verifiable data in making the claim that there is a different reason for consumers buying motorcycle x over the foreign brand, than the fact that it makes more noise. Thus, it is safe to reject teh argument in light of such flaws.